Hypotheticals
by aemelia113
Summary: A sleepover game puts Marinette on the spot thanks to a moment of distraction. Her friends want details, but there are some things a lady wants to keep to herself. (AKA, the girls find out about Marinette's secret boyfriend and the questions start flying). Oneshot. Rated T for suggestive content.


A/N: Hello, gentle readers! Prepare for an onslaught of Marichat. I've decided to post a bunch of un-beta'd works from my files, so here you go! Disclaimer: I don't own ML or any associated characters. Secondary disclaimer: I'm such trash for this ship and I'm sorry that basically everything I post is about it. I sincerely apologize, but they're just such fun to write! Tertiary disclaimer: this gets a little... suggestive. Onwards and upwards!

"So, if you had a chance to do the deed with Chat Noir, would you?"

Alya's question left the attendees of the sleepover in giggles... those who were paying attention anyhow.

They were playing a sort of truth or dare group game where they all did the same dare or answered the same question, and this was Alya's contribution. Naturally, she answered it first.

"I definitely would. He's very pretty, and he seems like a cool guy based on interviews he's done with me."

"A no from me," Rose chimed in. "He's definitely charming, but the puns and the messy sex hair? Not my type."

"I am far too gay for this question, but I guess if I had to pick a guy, it'd be Chat," Juleka answered, twining her fingers around Rose's.

"No offense to Chat Noir, but I don't really want to do the deed with anybody, so I'm a no," Alix chuckled.

Mylene surprised everyone with her shy reply of, "If I didn't have Ivan, I'd definitely do it."

Chloe scoffed, "He's attractive, but everyone knows Ladybug is way hotter. Since it would probably decrease my chances with her, I'd say no."

"He was really nice to me after the Vanisher thing," Sabrina whispered. "I'd say yes."

The only person who had yet to give her answer was Marinette, who had missed the question entirely by doodling in her sketchbook, tongue poking out in concentration, utterly absorbed in her latest idea and therefore oblivious to the topic of conversation.

"What about you, Mar?" Alya prompted.

"Hmm?" she hummed distractedly. "What about me?"

"Chat Noir? Sex? Thoughts?" Alya huffed with a good-natured smile and an accompanying eyeroll.

"Oh, I wouldn't know. I mean, he's a hell of a kisser, but that's about as far as we've gotten," she said offhandedly while focusing on making the curve of the waistline just right...

"WHAT?!" came the unanimous outcry of the assembled girls, the volume and hysteria of which was enough to knock Marinette out of the zone.

"Huh?" she uttered brilliantly, blinking at the gape-mouthed expressions of her female friends.

"You've made out with Chat Noir?!" Alya screeched, shaking her by the shoulders. "And you never told me? Details, woman, details!"

"Er," Marinette spluttered, face aflame, "I really didn't mean to admit that. Can we just pretend it never happened?"

"NO," came the emphatic response of all present.

"Oh," she coughed, blinking. "Ooo-kay, then. Well, it all started when he slipped and crashed on my balcony while running the rooftops because it had been raining and the shingles were slick. I heard a crash and came up to check on my flowerpots and there he was, sprawled on the tiles and the remains of my lavender plant. He looked up at me with an embarrassed smile and said, 'Good evening, Princess. I seem to have had a mishap with your garden...'"

"He called you Princess?" Rose interrupted with a dreamy sigh.

"Yeah, that's his nickname for me ever since that time he shadowed me on my date with Evillustrator and called himself my knight in shining armor," she began to explain.

"You went on a date with Nath while he was akumatized?" Alix gasped.

"Er, yes. It was the only way I could get him to promise to leave Chloe alone. If I had just managed to keep a hold of his pen..."

"You went on a date with an akuma to protect me?" Chloe murmured. "But I used to be awful to you!"

"Well, I didn't want you murdered by a giant high heel just because you said some mean stuff," Marinette insisted. "Look, am I going to get to tell you the story or not?"

"Please, let the girl talk," Alya begged. "I need to know how my best friend ended up secretly dating a superhero."

"Alright, so as I was saying, it all started because of a slippery roof tile. Then he apologized for destroying my plant and I invited him in to dry off. One thing led to another..."

"Oh my God," Juleka muttered.

"Not like that!" she yelped. "We ended up watching a movie together. I was already in the middle of setting up and just asked him to join me. So that's how movie nights with Chat became a weekly thing. And then he would pop by at random, happy just to talk or play mecha strike or watch me work, and we got to be close friends. And then there was this moment when everything shifted..."

Mylene made a tiny excited squeal and chirped, "Oh, how romantic!"

Marinette blushed furiously. "Well, sort of. We were both kind of a mess at the time. See, I said I couldn't hang out until I helped my parents with a huge order that had just come in, so Chat said he'd pitch in and speed things along a little. Turns out, he's _terrible_ in the kitchen. How does a person even manage to accidentally set fire to a bag of flour? Anyway, through a series of mishaps, we were both absolutely covered in powdered sugar and frosting and batter. I tried to step away from where we were working side by side, but that damn belt tail has a mind of its own and it had wrapped around my leg without me noticing. So the resistance when I tried to move made me fall, and I took Chat down with me."

"I think I can see where this is going," Sabrina cooed with a grin.

"So, he landed right on top of me," Marinette continued. "We looked ridiculous, and we were laughing so hard that his face got really close without me noticing. He noticed me blushing and he smirked in that infuriating way he has and purred, 'I think you've made me fall for you, Princess.' And usually I would have called him a silly cat or an incorrigible flirt or a hopeless pun addict but there was something about the way he was looking at me, so I just said, 'Not as hard as I've fallen for you,' and I went for it."

"That was your first kiss?" Alya spluttered. " _Girl_ , Nino and I made out in the music storage room. That is some straight-up romance novel stuff right there."

"I'm a lucky girl," she said with a helpless shrug and a dopey smile.

Just then, there was a knock on her trapdoor followed by it swinging open to admit the topic of conversation himself. He landed in a perfect crouch, eyes closed, smirk in place.

"Good evening, Princess, your knight is here to seek your fa-" he cut himself off as his eyes opened and he beheld the astounded and unexpected audience gawking at him. Marinette had her head buried in her hands. "-vor," he finished awkwardly, rising to his feet slowly. "Um, Marinette, what is-"

"I _told_ you I had the girls over tonight for a sleepover and that you shouldn't come! Weren't you paying attention?" she hissed, waving her hands.

"Erm, I was a bit _distracted_ because of that thing you were doing with your-"

"Do _not_ finish that sentence," she warned.

" _Please_ finish that sentence," Alya and Chloe begged at the same time.

"You might want to go before they start asking you questions," Marinette advised. "They ambushed me and tricked me into admitting that we're a couple."

"Okay, see you another night, Princess. Sorry for the interruption." He leapt out the window backed by the sounds of disappointment and dismay from the assembled girls.

"You're no fun at all," Chloe humphed.


End file.
